I Long To...

I'm in one of those contemplative moods today. Our daughter turned 15, got her driver's permit, ate a huge adult sized steak for lunch, and looks like a grown woman...I'm getting old! I've also felt odd today, my neck hurt and my ear was numb, so I decided I was having a stroke, I'm not, but thought I was for the good part of the day...last year I was having a year long heart attack...I'm not a hypocondriac...but I'm working on it! I long to be a productive person. I don't want to be average, mediocre, or to just get by. It is my hearts desire to make a difference in my world, to touch others in a way that leaves a deposit, and impacts the world around me. My success and significance no longer depend on the recognition of denominational leaders or the approval of those surrounding me, though I value both, I want to please the Lord...and myself. Recently I've come to realize that if I'm not happy with me no one else can be, I must be content knowing that I've been obedient to the Lord. Some days I wonder if I've made a difference in any one's life, if there is anything that I've done that really matters...I'm not whining, just saying I long to make a difference. It doesn't have to be in the limelight, I just want to hear Him say...Well Done!

Kaitlin Is 15!

Fifteen years ago at 11:14 in the morning I became the father of one of the most tremendous people in the world...My daughter Kaitlin! Today she is crossing a threshold of time that I'm not quite ready for, I'll pick her up from school, drive to the courthouse in Dade City, watch her take her driver's test, and hopefully bring home a elated new driver.(She Passed!) In Florida you have to take an online drug test, do the written test at the DMV, and pass the vision test...she'll do fine! Then we're off to pick up her new Vera Bradley backpack...which is an entirely different subject, it's her money! Then off to lunch...she's calling it a Daddy-Daughter Day, but it's really all about her, and it should be. I'm proud of her and am excited to see what the Lord has for her future, she loves God, wants to serve Him, speaks with a prophetic edge, and wants to be attorney! What a girl!

YeeHaw Junction

We went through this Famous Florida spot in the road this weekend, right pass the world famous Desert Inn and the Bluegrass Festival...Just kept going...a bit too famous for me!

The Middle Seat

I flew home from Atlanta yesterday, had a great flight, but I had to sit in the middle seat. I've never quite understood how airlines assign seating or how you end up with the boarding section. Air Tran boards by section and it doesn't seem to matter when you print your boarding pass, I was the 11th person to check in and still ended up in zone 6, and in row 15, which I quickly switched. Ended up in row 10 which is great, just behind business class with plenty of leg room, I just had to sit in the middle seat. There was a large man on the aisle and I was afraid that he was going to crowd me, but he didn't, a lady at the window, plenty of room on both sides...Great Flight!

Connecting The Events

Western Christianity it appears has become an event oriented commodity rather than a journey of relationship. We talk to God when we need something, when we're in trouble, or when we don't have anyone else to talk to...God forbid He doesn't answer, or answer in the way we think He should...We'll show Him and not talk with Him for awhile! I see this happening in church, if we don't have the right events people don't come, if we have too many events people don't come, and there is a constant changing of the rules...we pastors just aren't sure what the rules are. The thing about it is, it isn't just happening in church, it's happening inside of us. If I feel good today I will talk with the Lord, or if I need Him to help me out, if my kid is sick, if I've received a bad report from the doctor...if. It's not that we don't love Him or that we're not thinking about Him...or is it? Or maybe, and this is where I think it is, we're not in love, so we don't have as much in common with the Lord as we do with the events that we compare the Lord to! O God, this is my prayer today, help me to help myself, while I ask You to create new hunger in me, let me also recognize my responsibility, You can't pull out of me what isn't in me! You won't force me to love You, to pray and talk with You, to read Your love letters to me...Help me to initiate the effort, You've already initiated a relationship with us, help me to respond. I know that if I make an effort You will go beyond my ability to comprehend and do exceeding and abundantly above all that I ask or think...Let me not only love You when You answer my prayer or deliver me from evil, or send a check in the mail, or make me feel goosebumps. Help me to be in love with You when it's hard and dark, when nothing seems to be happening and even when hell is breaking loose...I want to simply love You for You....everything else is icing on the cake! Amen!

Lord, I Am Hungry...Make Me Hungry For You!

The theme at our church for 2007 is "Redigging The Wells!" We have been discussing the difference between digging a well for the first time and the need to redig a well after it has been contaminated and clogged up with stuff. Last night our pastor was preaching about redigging the wells of hunger, today it has hit me hard, I've been hungry for many things in my life, but am I hungry for God? I say that I am, but in truth there are times when I've allowed other things to satisfy my hunger...so was I actually hungry for God or just hungry? God make me hungry for You...not just for Your hand, but for Your heart. Lord make me so hungry for You that just another good service will not do, so that my favorite song will not satisfy, but only Your presence will do. I'm not asking just to feel better, or to say that I've been blessed, I'm asking You to conform me to Your image until I no longer resemble myself in action, attitude, and that even my appearance is more reflective of You....Make Me Hungry For You!

Need I Say More? Just Don't Call Between 8:00-9:00

What He's Done For Me!

I have this song in my head today and it won't let go of me. Somehow I have managed to get a song on my Ipod, I'm not sure if it's from a Clint Brown CD or Martha Munizzi, but the words keep going through my mind..."What He's Done For Me Is So Amazing...How He Loved Me So, I Cannot Explain, I Once Was Lost, But Now I'm Found, Was Blind, But Now I See...And What He's Done For Me...He Will Do For You!" Earlier this week I started to blog of my frustration with our world, of the actions of our leaders and of the attitudes of people in general. People just get on my nerves some days, and I'm quite positive that I get on peoples nerves...This week I have just felt fed up, but that's a negative report and I didn't want to blog that way...so I didn't blog at all! Then I started to write about our spiritual journey and the current shifting in the spiritual realm and of our need to remain faithful..You know, it's about staying in the line when you feel like getting out...but I didn't really want to preach. So today I wanted to say that what the Lord has done in my life is so amazing! He has been so faithful to me, even when I'm not faithful to Him, when He knows that I could do better and I'm lazy...He still loves me and continues to take care of us...I love Him and am amazed by Him! Maybe you will stop by my blog, and you won't find a book review, a prophetic promise, anything all that interesting...but what you will find is the testimony that God is faithful and the assurance that you can count on Him!

And The Gators Win! Need I say more? At My house it was me and the girls against the wife from Ohio And the Gators win! I didn't even watch the game and don't like sports And the Gators win!

Family Feud

As I sit in my office minding my own business a feud has begun in my home between my daughter and my wife, the subject: Who will win Monday evenings game between the Florida Gators and Ohio State. My wife is a native of Ohio, her father believes no one can beat Ohio State, of course, when we lived in Champaign, IL and the University of Illinois stomped them, a long distance phone call was made. My daughter is speaking loudly for the Gators, and I must say, I'm putting my money on the gators as well. The in-laws have also made their way to Florida today, just in time for the big event, so it's three to two, but I'll get the baby involved and the odds will be even!

Moving, Shaking, The Church Is Quaking!

I've been reading a message board that consists mainly of denominational ministers and members, I have a love hate relationship with that board...Love to hate it and hate to love it, at times I think I'm simply addicted, swear I'm not going to read it, have basically quit posting there, except when it just gets to me, and then I rarely use my real name, a pen name is perfectly acceptable, so my name is__________! There's been some discussion there concerning the emergent church, a movement within the Body of Christ that seems to have no denominational ties, it simply is the desire of men and women of God that want to see the church become what God has always intended for it to be. In this movement there appear to be many schools of thought, some I agree with, some I'm not sure of, and some I'm absolutely opposed to. What interests me is that concept that regardless of where the church has been, is, and will be, it is always emerging, it is constantly rising up in every generation to insure that the message of Christ and the Gospel are embraced. For some this movement is a matter of style, of cultural relevance, the ability to relate to the surroundings the congregation is located in. For others, it is separation from what is deemed traditional and the moving into the mystical realm of worship and ministering unto the Lord. To me, serving God is mystical, it is a mystery to me how a virgin could conceive a child and give birth to the savior of the world. It is a mystery to me how the Holy Spirit can operate in this earth in the manner that He does and it would work. It is a mystery to me how that we can believe in One that we have never seen, and yet, He remains real and relevant regardless of culture, community, and has never been hindered by time, traditions, or our inability to comprehend everything about Him. Christianity is a mission, it is about taking the message of Christ to people wherever they are, it's about finding a way to connect with people, to expose them to Christ and their need for Him. Personally, I love charismatic church, enjoy the emotional worship, the dancing and the praise, I love the spirited preaching and the overwhelming presence of the Lord...but when the books are closed and the day is done, what label we're under and how we did it really won't matter...All that will matter is that our names are written in the Book of God and that we have led others to Christ so their names could be there too! Call me simple, I'm just trying to get to heaven and take some with me!

Got Contacts Today!

My daughter Kaitlin and I went to the eye doctor today, she got some glasses for reading and I got contacts and new glasses. Funny thing, since my last visit two years ago my right has changed and needed a stronger prescription...the doctor said he didn't know why it's just the way it is! So now I've got to learn to stick my finger in my eye! They take you through a trial run, I got the right one in and out quickly, but had a more difficult time with the left side...Thank God I got the glasses!

The Donald

I saw this man on the Today Show this morning and he absolutely wore me out. I'm afraid to state my opinion because some how he might read this and sue me... but he wears me out!

Napping Neil

Have you ever had one of those days when you're just tired? Not of anything in particular, but of everything in general. That's me today, I went to bed at a normal time, slept fairly well, nothing bothering me today that wasn't bothering me yesterday...nobody bothering me today that wasn't bothering me yesterday...I'm just tired. I'm thinking about doing like Johnny Depp did on the latest Pirates of the Caribbean movie, paint eyeballs on my eyelids, sleep sitting up at my desk all day...I'd probably start drooling or snoring...or both, and give it away...Can't win on days like this can you!

The Race Is On...

The book reading contest has begun, and I intend on winning! Last night I began reading a book by Bishop Eddie Long, I'm a couple of chapters into it and it looks like a good read. From there I'm on to a book by Ted Dekker, an excellent author...I'm not certain if Kaitlin has started reading or not, I think I'll wait until I've read four or five books to ask...that way I'm ahead and can rub it in! I'm a wonderful father...can't you tell?