I Fear I May Forget
I was channel surfing this afternoon and came across the movie "Stepmom" a great story of a young lady(Julia Roberts) learning to adapt to becoming a stepmother and dealing with the dying mother(Susan Sarandon). In a moving meeting of the minds Julia Roberts tells Susan that her greatest fear is the when the daughter gets married and the stepmother is making over her, wanting this to be a special moment between a mother and daughter, that the daughter will look at her and say, "I wish my Mom was here!", to which the mother replies, "My greatest fear is that she won't!" I'm not normally a crying type person, don't get too emotional about many things, but I have to admit every time I see that movie I tear a tear or two during that part. My father passed away November 1, 1994, he was my friend, I didn't always agree with him, understand him, I'm sure he could have somethings different, but he was my Dad. I hate Father's Day, get depressed as it approaches and am thankful that I don't preach on that day any longer, I miss him and it overwhelms me. What I struggle with the most is that there are days when it seems like yesterday he was calling me, and there are days when I start to pick up the phone to call him, I say to myself I need to tell him about something or ask him a question, and then I catch myself and remember he isn't there. It's the other days that bother me the most, that it's now been almost thirteen years and there are those other days when I don't think of him at all, when it's almost as if he was never there, like I've forgotten and I force myself to remember...I don't want to forget.